Random Thoughts from a Sleepless Mind

Last night I spent the night with my awesome kids at BBC. We are practicing the drama for the Lifehouse song All I Need. They made some really great progress. I can't wait to see the finished product. We sat around until the wee hours of the morning talking about so many things. First it was Rebecca and her dating questions. Again, not saying anything bad about anyone, I just feel that the guy should pay for certain things like dinner and movie tickets. But to each his own I guess. Then we moved on to a lot of talk about the differences in Baptists. WOW. I was shocked that these teenagers who have grown up in church all thier lives had very little understanding of what the church they attend actually believes when it comes to predestination and eternal salvation. So we talked all that stuff out and then proved the existence of God, solved a few of the worlds major problems and it was off to bed.

4:00am. Rain so loud it wakes me from the previous 30 minutes of sleep. I lay there wondering what the storm looks like. Then a few minutes later Jamin awakes hungry and on a mission. His mother is there, faithful and sure to take care of him. She really is an amazing mom, wife, friend, lover, you name it!

8:00am. Taking a shower in the church office. Wondering just how tired I am going to be the rest of the day.

9:00am. Realizing that I am starting off the day in a hole. My forgetful mind yet again has inconvenienced myself and others but all works out ok.

2:00pm. Leaving work to go home and sleep.

3:00pm. Been home for a while now but watching episodes of Scrubs and The Office online.

4:30pm. Finally decide to sleep. But can't. My brain won't stop. Typical.

5:30pm. Leslie is coming home. She calls to let me know.

6:15pm. Out of bed from I think what was a total of 20 minutes of sleep. Get dressed and drive to Bellevue.

7:00pm. Lost in Cross Timbers subdivision. I hate my sense of direction.

7:10pm. Taking pictures with Anna, Jenny and Nathan. They all look so wonderful. I hope they have a good time tonight at Prom.

8:00pm. Eating a Chick-fil-A sandwich wishing I was home in bed.

Tyler is really turning into someone I didn't expect. He is growing up. He serves even when I know he wants a full-time part in the drama. But he's reliable and steps in to help when we need him.

Rebecca is really doing a great job directing the drama. I hope that she will realize that this is one way that her passions and talents can be played out to glorify God.

Lauren brought two friends last night. That was awesome. It was good to see that she thinks enough of her youth group that she is willing to bring her best friends into it.

Emily is going to be missed. She is scared and confused but I can't really blame her. She is standing on the verge of an amazing adverture. I hope she can find a new love for the complete satisfaction found only in God.

Father,

It's been a very rough past couple of days. I've been tired, sleepless, weak and vulnerable. Lord, my defenses have failed. I hate being here. I hate being so tired that fighting seems useless. I realize I need to take better care of myself. I will. I will be more careful when planning my time and make sure that there is time for rest. It's been so long since I have just rested.

I hate feeling like this. I just feel blank. Please fill this blank Lord. Refocus me, renew me, reenergize me. I love you. I'm sorry I haven't spent as much time with you as I normally do.