Can I?

Lord,
Can I pray like I want? Can I forget that what you want for me may be different than my desires? Can I ask you for the grand, the big, the high? Can I ask you for change? Can I ask you for what I really just want the most? Can I be honest now Lord?
I know I should pray that your will be done and that my will come second. But my hopes are so high. I want this so badly. In my mind it would fix things. Make things more easy to manage. More time, more rest, more ministry. Can I ask you for it Lord?
Will you consider my plea? Or have you already made up your mind? Can I lay my desires, my hearts deepest desire at your feet and trust you that you won't crush my dreams? Can I ask you for it? Will you give me what I want? Is it wrong to ask this?
Lord, Sure, I want what you want, it's just sometimes I want what you want to be what I want. How long will I be here? Have I put in enough time? Have I paid my dues? When will the opportunity come? Will it ever come? Can I ask you for it?
You know what is best that is obvious. All my life you have proven your goodness to me over and over again. You are my Good Father who loves me and is for me. So can I ask you for it? Will you give it to me?
I know it will be hard. I know it will be a challenge and I know it will stretch me in directions I have no experience in. But will you give it to me? Can I ask you for it Father?
I know I don't deserve it. I know I haven't earned it. I know it's so much bigger than myself but can I ask you for it anyways? Will you give it to me God?
Please?